Drunk and Funny
by mrscakeakajane
Summary: The title say's it all really, Puck gets supper drunk, standing on the tables can't remember his own name drunk, a short but funny story for Mark Salling's birthday now with chapter two
1. Chapter 1

**A/N. Hi guys this bunny just bit me, I know its short but give it a try, I hope you all like it. It's written as its Mark Salling's birthday on Wednesday. And I just had this image of Puck getting very drunk for his Birthday. (Sorry Mark, the things we fanfic writers make you do ;-) Happy Birthday.**

**Not betaed because I was in too much of a rush to post, I don't think there are too many errors.**

**Drunk and Funny.**

Puck was drunk, not the 'I'm a bit jolly drunk' either. This was the kind of drunk where it was quite probable that he wouldn't remember it tomorrow.

In fact he was having trouble remembering what his name was at the moment. And why he was standing on a table in the mall.

"Wow its high up here," He whispered. Well he thought he whispered, the little old lady who was slightly hard of hearing on the third floor heard him.

"Puck man get down," a voice pleaded.

Looking down, well not that far down. "Damn but your tall, I know you," Puck (thank god someone knew his name) said jumping down from the table in what in his mind was a totally rad move, but in reality left him sprawled on the floor looking like a shell-less turtle stuck on its back and scrabbling to get right ways up.

Two sets of strong hands pulled him up. "I know you," Puck repeated, in the same 'whisper' he'd used before. "I'm sorry I banged you're girl dude," He said sincerely.

"That was two years ago," a second voice pointed out.

Puck turned to see the new voice. "You have such pretty eyes," the voice snorted.

"Finn I swear I will not badmouth Rachel's wardrobe for a month if you let me be there when you tell him he said that."

"Where are we going?" Puck asked realising they were walking.

"Our place," Finn told him, trying to get him moving faster.

"Brilliant, I haven't had a three way in aaaaagessss," he said deliberately drawing out the letters.

"Finn..."

"I know I know, you'll be there, I need someone to take blackmail pictures anyway."

"Where's my shirt?" Puck asked, just realising he didn't have it on, "And my pants," He added.

"No idea, but we think someone stole them when you were singing 'I'm a little tea pot'" pretty eyes giggled.

"I can rock that song," Puck said confidently. "It's in my all time favourite top ten songs."

"What's first?" Pretty eyes asked.

"Don't..." Finn started to say, but it was too late.

"**THE WHEALS ON THE BUS GO ROUND AND ROUND, ROUND AND ROUND ROUND AND ROUND. **You got to join in on that bit kay. **ALL DAY LONG..."**

"Okay Puck we need to get you in the car now," Finn interrupted.

"I don't wanna!" Puck pouted.

"Puck, if you get in the car like a good boy, I'll let you have ice cream when you wake up, although I don't think you'll want it," Pretty eyes promised.

"Mint choc chip," Puck asked.

"Oh god, you didn't tell me Puck was armed with puppy eyes," Pretty eyes accused Finn.

"Can we just get him home please, we need to get him to bed."

"Everyone wants the Puckasaurus in bed. But you didn't buy me dinner," Puck vaguely felt himself be strapped into a car. He didn't remember the drive home. Or being walked inside and tucked into a comfortable bed.

But when he was woken the next morning by Finn shaking him and Kurt standing close by armed with his phone, he really really wished he could remember something, because he just knew he was about to pay for something.

**Don't forget to review **


	2. Chapter 2

**This was meant to be a one shot, a very little one shot, but apparently I have to write a second chapter, I was ordered to. I can never resist puppy eyes, they truly are evil.**

**I hope you like this second chapter.**

**Love you all thanks for your reviews for chapter one. One of the things I love about posting new story's and chapters because people then go back and read my other stories, I get a lot of favourite stories alerts, but no review. So if you do go back and read my other stories please drop me a line and let me know what you think of them.**

**I adore getting reviews, I get my email on my phone and every time I get a review or a story alert my phone buzzes and I can't stop grinning. So make me smile and review. please**

Chapter 2 – The Morning After.

Sat up then groaned and flopped back down into the bed. He could hear Kurt sniggering and taking photos.

"Would you please stop taking photos," Puck asked annoyed.

"Ah, it speaks," teased Kurt, from a safe distance.

Finn sniggered. "How much of last night do you remember?" He asked unsympathetically.

Puck tried to think. Nothing jumped to mind. "What did I do?" Puck asked tentatively, not sure if he wanted to know.

"You called Kurt pretty eyes and sang wheals on the bus for him," Finn informed him fighting back a smile.

"Damn," Puck tried to sit up only to be pushed back down by Kurt.

"Stay there," the smaller boy instructed. "I'll get you some painkillers and something to eat,"

"M'k," Puck snuggling back into the comfortable bed.

"You can have mint choc chip ice-cream when you're feeling better," Kurt teased heading for the stairs out of the basement.

"Did I do anything really stupid?" Puck asked, knowing he'd get an honest answer.

"Other than calling Kurt pretty eyes all the time?" Finn teased grinning.

"Well he does," Puck defended.

"Dude, are you crushing on my brother?" Finn asked failing to look as surprised as he should.

Puck groaned, "What did I say?" he asked knowing he must have said something to tip the normally oblivious teen off.

"When Kurt went to get extra pillows and blankets, I got you undressed and into bed. He thought you'd be uncomfortable if he did it. You said you've been thinking about being in Kurt's bed for ages and asked if he was sharing with you," Finn explained, he didn't tease, he didn't want to upset a boy he'd considered a brother since second grade.

"He didn't hear did he?" Puck asked worried, he wasn't ready for any of this to come out yet.

"No, he came in about five minutes later with blankets. You should tell him though."

"I can't, he hates me," Puck muttered sadly.

The door to the basement opened and Kurt sauntered down carrying a tray and a bag of goodies for them to munch on.

Puck gratefully accepted the coffee he was offered, and the toast. "Sorry if I was a moron last night."

"It's nothing I'm not used to," Kurt said in his normal manner, pushing Puck over to the far side of the bed so he could sit on it too. Finn took up a spot at the bottom of the bed leaning against the wall.

"Hey I'm not that bad, not any more anyway," Puck insisted.

"True." Kurt snagged some toast, having made plenty for all of them, "But the next time you're in my bed you had better be sober. Now what are we watching?" He asked going over to his DVD collection, leaving a shocked Puck and sniggering Finn behind.


End file.
